Saturday, May 1, 2010

ART INSTRUCTION SCHOOLS AND THE "ART TEST"

A couple years ago when I was up watching late night crap on t.v. the Art Instruction Schools commercial came on with that froggy-voiced Tom Stuart asking once again. "Do you have an interest in art?". I've been seeing these commercials and ads in magazines since I was a kid and always wondered how I would be graded on my "art test". Would I get an A for amazing artistic skill? Could I sketch that pirate better than anyone had done before?
Being bored I decided to jot down the number and give it a call.
At 3:00 am the lady answered the phone and took my address. I couldn't wait for my stinking test to arrive in the mail. I asked her if she could send me seven of them just in case I made a mistake and she agreed.
Here's the stupid commercial, I'm sure you've seen it a million dozen times but watch it again just for the heck of it:



Every time I see one of these Art Instruction Schools ads in a magazine I rip it out and save it. Who would've known they had so many fun heads of characters with names ending with the letter "Y". You could make a whole cartoon series out of this crap.

And what do you think you can win for prizes? Is it like a competition? Maybe it's like a coloring contest like they have at the waffle house. If you are a little boy can you win a date with Tom Stuart. Who knows? It sure sounds exciting!

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When my tests arrived I had so much fun, there was a fold-out brochure with a really mind-bending test and all kinds of new characters to try and sketch. I tried really hard to make them as smooth and perfect as I could since I knew they would be carefully judged. I really wanted those mysterious prizes...

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The best ones I framed and sold at one of my art shows. but here are a couple leftover ones I scanned:

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I'm going to dig around in my junk and find some of the other ones to post later.
By the way, the Art Instruction School is a scam. They just want you to teach yourself how to paint Bob Ross style and buy a bunch of their crappy art supplies. And you don't get a date with Tom either. It sure is fun to do that darn test though!!!

4 comments:

Bellesouth said...

I used to be so mesmerized by those commercials when I was a kid. I even tried to draw "Tippy" a few times. I sucked at my Tippy drawings. I love your human-dog hybrid.

STEVEFELLDOWN said...

Thanks. I had this one version I sold at an art show. You would have loved it. I mixed up the other characters like Abraham Lincoln with the pirate hat and the turtle with the woman's hair.

Anne Cognito said...

THANK YOU for posting these! Found you on a google search looking for that damn pirate. Man o man, does this take me back to flipping through the TV Guide at my Grandma's while she made me fried bologna and Chef Boyardee ravioli and Bob Barker explained the day's showcase showdown.

mbishop said...

OMG! I think I love you! If my hunch is right, you also speak fluent sarcasm!

I've been trying to find any info I can on AIS. I'm fearing a knock on the door.

If some rogue traveling salesman does show up on my doorstop he may get shot and fed to my pet dragon.

Is there any legit "online" courses you could recommend?